You Don"t Deserve To Be Knocked About
By the time you are five years old much of your personality will be formed.
Everything that has happened to you from the moment you were born will have had an impact on how you see yourself and how you see the world.
Once you have a belief about who you are or how things are it sticks.
Some beliefs you will be conscious of others will be held in your subconscious.
Then you will go about making life 'fit' your belief system.
Try this for size.
Angela is not confident, she frets about how she looks, she's afraid to speak up for herself, she has low self-esteem and she expects that life will confirm her beliefs.
Angela expects people to treat her as though she is worthless.
She picks men that confirm that belief.
The men that Angela is comfortable with are bullies, they put her down, insult her and push her around.
That fits with what Angela believes, she thinks she is worthless, ugly and not very smart, so deep down she agrees with what they say, it confirms her beliefs about herself - and her belief that men are no good.
How did this come about? Angela's father was a bully.
He insulted her and hit her from the time she was a tiny toddler.
He treated her mother like a slave.
This is what Angela expects.
When Angela meets a 'good guy', she feels uncomfortable, she feels that she doesn't deserve to be treated well or kindly, her discomfort gives the wrong message and the 'good guy' thinks he's not welcome.
Angela will probably spend her life being abused and being unhappy, the same fate may befall her children, but at least she will think she's right about one thing, all men are bad! If this sounds like you, you can get help to change the way you think about yourself.
You might like to begin the process right now by making a date to talk through your problems with a good friend, your best friends know what's happening in your life, you won't surprise them - they will also be very willing to help you feel better about yourself.
Ask your friend to tell you what she admires about you, ask her to outline your good points, don't be shy, you'll feel amazing when you hear another person tell you why they enjoy your company.
You deserve to be happy and treated with love and respect, and it all starts with you treating yourself with love and respect.
Everything that has happened to you from the moment you were born will have had an impact on how you see yourself and how you see the world.
Once you have a belief about who you are or how things are it sticks.
Some beliefs you will be conscious of others will be held in your subconscious.
Then you will go about making life 'fit' your belief system.
Try this for size.
Angela is not confident, she frets about how she looks, she's afraid to speak up for herself, she has low self-esteem and she expects that life will confirm her beliefs.
Angela expects people to treat her as though she is worthless.
She picks men that confirm that belief.
The men that Angela is comfortable with are bullies, they put her down, insult her and push her around.
That fits with what Angela believes, she thinks she is worthless, ugly and not very smart, so deep down she agrees with what they say, it confirms her beliefs about herself - and her belief that men are no good.
How did this come about? Angela's father was a bully.
He insulted her and hit her from the time she was a tiny toddler.
He treated her mother like a slave.
This is what Angela expects.
When Angela meets a 'good guy', she feels uncomfortable, she feels that she doesn't deserve to be treated well or kindly, her discomfort gives the wrong message and the 'good guy' thinks he's not welcome.
Angela will probably spend her life being abused and being unhappy, the same fate may befall her children, but at least she will think she's right about one thing, all men are bad! If this sounds like you, you can get help to change the way you think about yourself.
You might like to begin the process right now by making a date to talk through your problems with a good friend, your best friends know what's happening in your life, you won't surprise them - they will also be very willing to help you feel better about yourself.
Ask your friend to tell you what she admires about you, ask her to outline your good points, don't be shy, you'll feel amazing when you hear another person tell you why they enjoy your company.
You deserve to be happy and treated with love and respect, and it all starts with you treating yourself with love and respect.