Beware Of Robot Floor Cleaners
Maybe it would have been better for the human race if the world had come to an end last December.
I've seen irrefutable proof that our species is heading for a bad end.
No, I'm not talking about the "Fiscal Cliff," I'm talking about being replaced by robotic floor cleaners.
That's right, the IRobot Corporation manufactured roomba.
Sure, you thought--like I did--that it was a bit of a Cosmic Joke, this little circular disk racing around the floor bumping into everything, snapping up dirt and trash--or at least pretending to.
This is a robot? This is the thing Sci-Fi writers have been warning us about since H.
G.
Wells's War of The Worlds? Did you really think they'd come stomping, shooting,flaming at us like the killing machines in the Terminator movies? Oh no, remember they are smarter than humans; rather than going to war with us, they intend to corrupt our young by hauling them about, singing their lullabies and favorite songs and generally usurping their parents' duties to the extent they won't need us anymore.
Before our poor children know what's happened they'll be the ones at hard labor.
Where's my proof, you ask? Well, my first glimmer of enlightenment came watching the popular Utube video of a baby sitting on a roomba as it entertained the baby while pretending to clean the floor.
My next shock of recognition came at a neighbor's where their roomba danced about the nursery playing a lullaby; their infant was completely entranced by this monster! Oh, and Jingle Bells.
They can play Jingle Bells while they scoot around the floor.
We've got to stop them before they take over the music business completely.
Next I expect them to link up with ebook publishers; no more us reading to our kids.
Roomba will handle it for us.
They must be stopped first.
At first I thought these machines were programmed at birth for this nefarious activity.
But no, it's the internet that's broadcasting their insidious programs worldwide.
Websites like the RobotAppStore.
Com that offers all sorts of free applications for roomba's.
Free? Of course they're free! But now that we know what strings are attached we've got to close them down before our childrens' minds are lost to us forever.
We still have a chance! I'd like to be of more assistance in the fight but I've been taken over by the iPad!
I've seen irrefutable proof that our species is heading for a bad end.
No, I'm not talking about the "Fiscal Cliff," I'm talking about being replaced by robotic floor cleaners.
That's right, the IRobot Corporation manufactured roomba.
Sure, you thought--like I did--that it was a bit of a Cosmic Joke, this little circular disk racing around the floor bumping into everything, snapping up dirt and trash--or at least pretending to.
This is a robot? This is the thing Sci-Fi writers have been warning us about since H.
G.
Wells's War of The Worlds? Did you really think they'd come stomping, shooting,flaming at us like the killing machines in the Terminator movies? Oh no, remember they are smarter than humans; rather than going to war with us, they intend to corrupt our young by hauling them about, singing their lullabies and favorite songs and generally usurping their parents' duties to the extent they won't need us anymore.
Before our poor children know what's happened they'll be the ones at hard labor.
Where's my proof, you ask? Well, my first glimmer of enlightenment came watching the popular Utube video of a baby sitting on a roomba as it entertained the baby while pretending to clean the floor.
My next shock of recognition came at a neighbor's where their roomba danced about the nursery playing a lullaby; their infant was completely entranced by this monster! Oh, and Jingle Bells.
They can play Jingle Bells while they scoot around the floor.
We've got to stop them before they take over the music business completely.
Next I expect them to link up with ebook publishers; no more us reading to our kids.
Roomba will handle it for us.
They must be stopped first.
At first I thought these machines were programmed at birth for this nefarious activity.
But no, it's the internet that's broadcasting their insidious programs worldwide.
Websites like the RobotAppStore.
Com that offers all sorts of free applications for roomba's.
Free? Of course they're free! But now that we know what strings are attached we've got to close them down before our childrens' minds are lost to us forever.
We still have a chance! I'd like to be of more assistance in the fight but I've been taken over by the iPad!